I have committed the soft suicide of self-denial for much of my life. I have been intentionally moving along the path from self-sacrifice to self-transcendence. Self-sacrifice is a dichotomous zero-sum game; according to this belief, what I lose or forfeit the world gains. Self-transcendence includes the self as part of a greater whole. I am choosing to live my life in a way that is spiritually and materially sustainable and life affirming in every way. I am acting with integrity out of love rather than with disunion out of guilt. If we all cooperatively are what we truly desire based on differentiation rather than competition, the whole will benefit overall. What would it take to live in complete, consistent self- and other-affirming integrity?
Too often, I find myself making decisions based on conditions. This includes waiting for a “when” to happen before taking action and wondering what “if” something goes wrong. When I become aware of this, I recognize that living in this way negatively distorts the sense of wonder and possibility in my life. It also leads to limited expression of my needs. Rather than making decisions based on conditions, I think it is more effective to consistently integrate my truest, deepest desires into my every thought and action. By doing so, I am living in alignment with my life purpose rather than reacting with fear.